I Tell It Like It Is: the Psychology of Common Sense
12/17/2016
I Tell It Like It Is
Expressions people use can tell you a lot about how they think, act and relate to others. One expression I often here in my work is: "I tell it like it is." On the surface, what I think the person is trying to convey is that he or she is a " straight shooter" -- honest, does not play games and only speaks the truth.
But if one digs a little deeper, and explores the psychological assumptions that underlie such a statement, a more revealing meaning of how the person sees and understands his or her surroundings becomes apparent. The expression: "I tell it like it is" signifies that the person truly believes that he or she is seeing things how they really are -- i.e., objectively.
Common Sense Verses Subjectivity
Many people who say statements like "I tell it like it is" also believe they possess what they refer to as "common sense." They believe they are able to see things the same way other people see things who are down to earth, level headed and don't have their heads up in the clouds. But are these people actually seeing things as they truly are in an objective manner?
As a psychologist, the idea that someone believes they see things "objectively" is always suspect. Can a person actually see things as they are or does each person have a particular perspective?
Existential philosophers refer to the concept of perspective as "subjectivity." They often use the analogy that each individual sees the world through a tinted lens. We all know that some of those lens can be dark, others grey or red, and for the fortunate ones perhaps rosy.
When I contemplate the concept of "common sense" I always think of the proverbs my parents and grandparents taught me. They spoke as if they were fundamental truths and rules to live by. However, If you analyzes these proverbs, one discovers that many of them actually contradicted each other and did not have much in common . To make my point, here is a short list of some common sense proverbs that contradict each other:
He who hesitates is lost.......................................All good things come to those who wait
You are never to old to learn...............................You cannot teach an old dog new tricks
It is better to be safe than sorry'..........................Nothing ventured nothing gained
The best things in life are free.............................There is no such thing as a free lunch
Opposites attract ................................................Birds of a feather stick together
Actions speak louder than words.....................The pen is mightier that the sword
A rolling stone gathers no moss..................... Stop and smell the roses
A penny saved is a penny earned...................Penny wise and pound foolish
As you can see, the wisdom of common sense is not always consistent or objective. There are many perspectives and some of them are contradictory. When someone says "I tell it like it is" what they are really doing is telling it as they see it -- and how they see it is colored by their own subjectivity. When someone say "I have common sense" what he or she really is saying is that they believe their perspective is the right one -- the point of view that others should also take as truth.
