Naomi Berger, LMFT, LMHC, CAP, CEDS, ACS

"When Your Partner's Feeling Don't Show"

When we commit to relationship we usually expect that our partner will reciprocate with the same level of emotional involvement that we put in it. Some of us hope to find a partner , a soul mate, who will share and understand our feelings and ways of thinking on an intensely personal level. Others, don't expect such an intense level of involvement and feel more comfortable maintaining personal privacy within a more defined boundaries in the relationship. Conflicts may arise when the two partners differ in their expectations of how close they should become. One partner may feel emotionally stranded feeling abandoned and craving more closeness, while the other partner may feel smothered or pressured into providing more of his or her emotional self than can possibly be given.

A solid relationship is one in which feelings can be readily expressed and shared while each of the partners is able to experience a sense of their own identity.

All to often however, there is a discrepancy between the two partners in terms of how much of their emotional life they make available to the other. It is usually the emotionally available partner who feels most of the pain.

To read more and learn about the different personalities and reasons for becoming emotionally unavailable and how to overcome resistance toward emotional closeness, go to "Articles" at www.thecouplesplace.net