Remember Romance? Everyday Ways to Be Romantic By Stephanie Castillo
Talk about a sweet end to summer: August is Romance Awareness month, and a new survey from the creators of Couple—a relationship app designed to help couples interact in real-time through photos, videos and audio notes—has some new insight on what it means to be romantic.
Of the 2,000 couples that participated in the survey, and of the men and women polled, 98% said romance is an important part of relationships. Yet nearly 30% of men and women admitted there was room for improvement. The discrepancy could stem from the fact men and women have different definitions of romance. For example, 20% more men find physical touch to be romantic while 22% of women prefer quality time.
In either case, romance has come a long way since boxes of chocolate and bouquets of flowers. “Creating romance is creating a memory through experience,” says Lisa Bahar, a licensed marriage and family therapist in Newport Beach, California. “It’s really about thinking about the other person on a level that they may assume you have forgotten.”
That’s not to say you always have to pull out all the stops. Researchers from the University of Zurich find that just hugging your partner can work wonders for both your relationship and individual well-being. “On days when participants touched their partner and vice versa, their mood was better than on days with less touch,” says lead researcher Andrea Horn, PhD, a psychopathologist at the University of Zurich’s Psychology Institute. “On average, individuals who were hugged on a daily basis were more positive even six months later.”
Bottom line: a little extra attention goes a long way. “It’s knowing the other person thought of you,” says Holly Cox, PhD, a licensed marriage and family therapist and founder of the Lotus Therapy Center in Orlando, Fla. “Romance doesn’t have to be fancy; it can be sharing a cup of coffee in a park your partner loves. It requires little effort, and you can do that tomorrow.”
