According to an old fable, the Fisher King is ill, lies dying in his castle. His kingdom is no better off; dread and hopelessness fills the land like a poisonous fog. One knight can save the king and his kingdom. His name is Parsifal.

Parsifal is the youngest and purest of knights at the king’s round table. He and a companion are sent off to wander and search for the Holy Grail. If and when he finds it and he asks the magical grail question, the Fisher King will be healed and all the land with him. Of course, Parsifal, often interpreted to mean “fool”, doesn’t know this. It’s as if he is blind, blind to these hidden realities.

When he least expects it, Parsifal does bump into the Holy Grail, is dumbfounded and keeps silent. He has been taught as a child to be seen, not heard. He uses rules for children to guide him as an adult and he forgets to ask the magical question.

The light of enlightenment fades, the Holy Grail disappears and the Fisher King goes on dying. Parsifal goes on living and searching. Hopefully, he matures to the point that when he again stumbles upon the Grail, he is able to speak and ask the right question.

We as a species seem to do “stumble-on-learning” about life, about marriage, about growing up and maturing. It really seems at times we are blind, bumblers who take forever to learn, and then we forget.

At the same time, there come moments in our lives that have the potential to be luminous, magical and healing. As if our eyes are at last opened and we can see, if only for a moment.

Two things are required to reap the benefits of “finding the nut” despite our blindness.
1. Keep on going. In the going on living, we can learn and grow and that keeps the options open that we will again find a nut. Keep taking risks. Stay curious about yourself and others. Search, explore, and ask questions. Life is an experiment for all of us, whether we recognize that fact or not. Try out new way of being alive, married, working or parenting. What do you have to lose?
2. Stay awake. Be as mindful as your level of growth and maturity allows. This will enable you to recognize the “nut” when you find it and know what to do with it. Life is a series of long and boring stretches interrupted by unpredictable intervals of magical moments. If you fall asleep during the long stretches, you lose that opportunity to get the healing when it “suddenly” appears. Other opportunities will come along, but we don’t know when. Nuts and Holy Grails are where you find them.

Oh, what was the magical grail question? “Whom does the Grail serve?” Healing answer: “Those who ask of it.” It is smart to know when to ask for help. Call me, Paul W Anderson, PhD and we’ll search for your answers to make thing better for you and yours.