Nina Danhorn, MS LPC NCC
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Grief and Loss Around the Holidays

10/4/2012
Loss is an inevitable part of life, and grief is a natural part of the healing process. Loss usually causes a lot of pain and scars us very deeply.We all have different ways of coping with loss, but so many of us leave the wounds without proper treatment. Proper self-care is extremely important when going through loss.

Dealing with it will allow you to free yourself from pain and help you rediscover life and peace again. There are many options available in order to assist those dealing with the pain of loss. Those are support groups, organization resources, grief workshops, church events, individual counseling etc. Usually counselors offer grief support around the holidays as it is a a very tough time for those undergoing this difficult life transition.

Holidays remind us of the special times with our loved one, happier times and special memories. They also bring on difficult emotions and awareness to the foreground of our minds. In our culture, where a typical happy family is widely promoted and accepted, there seems to be no room left for the REAL and true families and individuals, suffering in silence and having to pretend that everything is all right. We feel shame for our feelings and think that we have to hide them, tuck them away deep inside ourselves, where nobody can see them. Yet in the quiet of the night, when none can see us, we hurt, cry and mourn losses.

Are we expected to "just forget about it and move on"?The answer is NO. Every one of us has to go through the ever-changing encounter with death as part of the natural cycle. Every one of us experiences loss at some point in our lives. And every one of us deals with it in our own unique way. There is no time frame, there are no set of rules.

The key is to get in touch with it, see it, live it and accept it. Methods like Art Therapy, Expressive Arts, SoulCollage(R) are excellent pathways for getting in touch with out inner selves, our feelings and those things that haunt us. Please take care of yourself this holidays season and fund support in your grieving.